Boy: Hey, who are you?
Girl: I am a young girl!
Boy: No, you are not. YOU ARE CRIPPLE!
Girl: No, I am not cripple... just a disability!
That boy called other boys to come and shouted "Cripple! Cripple! Cripple!"... The girl just kept silent and walked, because in this situation she could not have ability to fight back....
I had 12 years living in this bullying environment. I have not talked to anyone, even my family members. I knew that if i tell them, they might let me stay at home as the best way to protect me. It means that if so, I may not have any opportunity to go to school. So I decided to keep it to be confidential for more than 20 years.
Last year, when I participated a workshop at CBM Australia, I decided to speak out. At that time, this was the first time I talked about my story. During my talk, I could not control my feeling. I cried a lot while talking.
And now, I decide to write it down here with hoping that someone who has the same situation of mine will have motivation to fight for their lives.
I was born in a poor family in a rural area in the middle of Vietnam. When I was 4 years old, I got polio. That was a horrible point in my life. It started for a chain of bad things that happened in my childhood and became as a scar in my heart.
Polio syndrome makes me can not walk as non-disabled people. My legs are weak. I find it very easy to fall down. At that time, I did not realise that I am a disabled person. I was so innocent.
One day, I went to primary school (grade 1 - 5). Everyone looked me as an alien. No one wanted to make friend with me. They tried to isolated me. After the first day at school, I went back home and cried. I told my parents about that. They said I just have the only way to change my life is studying, if i can not overcome the challenges, I will stay home. Staying home? No no, I do not want that. I have to go to school.
I continued going to school. My classmates had never stopped bullying on me.
They imitated me
They pushed me down
They hit me
They threw trash on me
They torn my notebooks
They broke my pencils
They digged a hole on my way, then covered by dry leaves. I did not see, so I felt down this hole. My feet was sprain....
All then they laughed at me without any help.
I told to my teacher about that. My teacher gave me an advice that I had to avoid my bad friends. But how? How could I avoid them? I did not know... so I kept silent and stood with these things.
I stood all with hoping that I would go to secondary school (grade 6 -9) soon. I hoped that I will not meet any bad friends there.
Oh no! Bad luck for me! I was still bullied by other bad friends. At secondary school,
They imitated me again
They torn my books and notebooks
They torn my exam paper if I got high marks
They wrote down "cripple" on a piece of paper, then pasted on my back, then they laughed.
They destroyed my bike. Many times I could not get back home early because I had to lead my bike in around 5km from school.
They threw a liquid that mixed water and chilli on me....
Can you image how I feel at that time????
I told to my teacher, but she said these friends are mad. So she could not punish them, because they might hit me on my way back home if they were punished.
At this point, I realised that I differ from them because I am a disabled person. I was so depressed and considered about suicide.... But, when I got home, my parents were so happy if I got high marks. At the moment, I recognised that I can make my parents happy, and I am happy if they are happy.
I made a decision that I have to ignore all bad things that happened and will happen, I have to focus on my study, because that is the best way to change my life. My parents were so right when they said that. I continued studying. I feel so lucky to grow up in my family. Even my family is not rich but they are my motivation in all my achievements.
I entered to high school (grade 10 -12). I was a bit luck when classmates here were not bad as much as before. I had some close friends here. Anyway, I still was faced with bullying by words. Some friends here still called me "cripple" sometimes, but I felt so much better than primary and secondary schools.
As I said I studied so hard because of my future and my parents. So I always achieved good marks in schools. After graduated from high school, I entered to a HCM University of Social Science and Humanities (Vietnam National University) with the highest mark. I became the dux of Sociology Department. Four years later, I was the dux of Sociology Department again, and then being a lecturer at Binh Duong University.
My life has changed and I got a big change when I got a full scholarship from Australian Government. Let's think back about my childhood, if I had given up my dream going to school, I would not have had any chance to study oversea and achieve the degree I want. Thus, if you have dreams, please do not give up!
For my story, I tried to forget that time but it is not easy for me to do so. Sometimes, it makes me stronger, sometimes it makes me being miserable.... When I decide to speak out, it means that I feel being sharing by readers.
I strongly believe that there are many people with disabilities in Vietnam and developing countries as well, particularly who live in rural areas, faced or are facing with a bullying. So, I told my story just because I want to let you know that please do not judge people by their appearance. Disability does not mean impossible!
An Nguyen
Melbourne, 8 May 2015
Girl: I am a young girl!
Boy: No, you are not. YOU ARE CRIPPLE!
Girl: No, I am not cripple... just a disability!
That boy called other boys to come and shouted "Cripple! Cripple! Cripple!"... The girl just kept silent and walked, because in this situation she could not have ability to fight back....
I had 12 years living in this bullying environment. I have not talked to anyone, even my family members. I knew that if i tell them, they might let me stay at home as the best way to protect me. It means that if so, I may not have any opportunity to go to school. So I decided to keep it to be confidential for more than 20 years.
Last year, when I participated a workshop at CBM Australia, I decided to speak out. At that time, this was the first time I talked about my story. During my talk, I could not control my feeling. I cried a lot while talking.
And now, I decide to write it down here with hoping that someone who has the same situation of mine will have motivation to fight for their lives.
I was born in a poor family in a rural area in the middle of Vietnam. When I was 4 years old, I got polio. That was a horrible point in my life. It started for a chain of bad things that happened in my childhood and became as a scar in my heart.
Polio syndrome makes me can not walk as non-disabled people. My legs are weak. I find it very easy to fall down. At that time, I did not realise that I am a disabled person. I was so innocent.
One day, I went to primary school (grade 1 - 5). Everyone looked me as an alien. No one wanted to make friend with me. They tried to isolated me. After the first day at school, I went back home and cried. I told my parents about that. They said I just have the only way to change my life is studying, if i can not overcome the challenges, I will stay home. Staying home? No no, I do not want that. I have to go to school.
I continued going to school. My classmates had never stopped bullying on me.
They imitated me
They pushed me down
They hit me
They threw trash on me
They torn my notebooks
They broke my pencils
They digged a hole on my way, then covered by dry leaves. I did not see, so I felt down this hole. My feet was sprain....
All then they laughed at me without any help.
I told to my teacher about that. My teacher gave me an advice that I had to avoid my bad friends. But how? How could I avoid them? I did not know... so I kept silent and stood with these things.
I stood all with hoping that I would go to secondary school (grade 6 -9) soon. I hoped that I will not meet any bad friends there.
Oh no! Bad luck for me! I was still bullied by other bad friends. At secondary school,
They imitated me again
They torn my books and notebooks
They torn my exam paper if I got high marks
They wrote down "cripple" on a piece of paper, then pasted on my back, then they laughed.
They destroyed my bike. Many times I could not get back home early because I had to lead my bike in around 5km from school.
They threw a liquid that mixed water and chilli on me....
Can you image how I feel at that time????
I told to my teacher, but she said these friends are mad. So she could not punish them, because they might hit me on my way back home if they were punished.
At this point, I realised that I differ from them because I am a disabled person. I was so depressed and considered about suicide.... But, when I got home, my parents were so happy if I got high marks. At the moment, I recognised that I can make my parents happy, and I am happy if they are happy.
I made a decision that I have to ignore all bad things that happened and will happen, I have to focus on my study, because that is the best way to change my life. My parents were so right when they said that. I continued studying. I feel so lucky to grow up in my family. Even my family is not rich but they are my motivation in all my achievements.
I entered to high school (grade 10 -12). I was a bit luck when classmates here were not bad as much as before. I had some close friends here. Anyway, I still was faced with bullying by words. Some friends here still called me "cripple" sometimes, but I felt so much better than primary and secondary schools.
As I said I studied so hard because of my future and my parents. So I always achieved good marks in schools. After graduated from high school, I entered to a HCM University of Social Science and Humanities (Vietnam National University) with the highest mark. I became the dux of Sociology Department. Four years later, I was the dux of Sociology Department again, and then being a lecturer at Binh Duong University.
My life has changed and I got a big change when I got a full scholarship from Australian Government. Let's think back about my childhood, if I had given up my dream going to school, I would not have had any chance to study oversea and achieve the degree I want. Thus, if you have dreams, please do not give up!
For my story, I tried to forget that time but it is not easy for me to do so. Sometimes, it makes me stronger, sometimes it makes me being miserable.... When I decide to speak out, it means that I feel being sharing by readers.
I strongly believe that there are many people with disabilities in Vietnam and developing countries as well, particularly who live in rural areas, faced or are facing with a bullying. So, I told my story just because I want to let you know that please do not judge people by their appearance. Disability does not mean impossible!
An Nguyen
Melbourne, 8 May 2015
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